personality test

sent to me by julius...he's making a list.
i used to be an ISTJ back in high school...


INFP - The HealerYou scored 50 I versus E, 40 N versus S, 40 F versus T, and 40 J versus P!
Your ideal mate is known as the healer. As a romantic partner, this type is usually supportive and nuturing, however, they have a high need for individuality. Harmony is extremely important to this type as they are very affected by conflict and tension, which also makes them resist confronting their partners directly about problems. When this type gets angry, they usually blame themselves, rather than their partners. This type can also be stubborn and unyielding when they feel they are being criticized or mistreated. They feel the most appreciated when their partners listen to them carefully. They need to be understood. They need to hear their partners express their feelings, the more often, the better.


the truth in it is uncanny...

spine-chilling morning

my friends are off to puerto galera for the long weekend. they met at cubao at around five this morning. i really wanted to go with them, but now i'm quite thankful i decided not to...else i would've witnessed a really creepy sight...

this morning, when i woke up at around 10 am, i set myself out for another usual, boring saturday at home. after breakfast, i finished disc three of LOST (which i slept on last night...) after constant battle with my bed i finally decided to get up and got myself ready to work out. lifted some weights while watching the catch-up marathon of the amazing race. then i had lunch (a late one because i had to rest for a couple of hours) my om sent me lechon from my uncle's birthday. then i just played with mc-mc and talked on the phone...nothing spine-chilling so far, i know...

then my mom arrived, surprisingly early. apparently they sent the workers early because it was my uncle's birthday. so as my mom entered our door our conversation kinda went like this:

me: oh ma, aga niyo ah..
mom: birthday kasi ni tommy.
me: ah ok...
mom: alam mo ba, nagbigti yung kapit-bahay natin sa harap. (in a nothing's-the-matter tone...)
me: ano?!!!

yes, one of our neighbors hung himself. well, it shocked me. what was creepier was that he hung himself right in their garage...which is directly visible from our front windows...great. my other uncle who lives in the front house witnessed everything from their window! we're not sure what time he hung himself, but my mom said the dogs were going crazy last night at around 3 am. the body was discovered at around 5am (it was dangling off a rope beside their punching bag). rumors say that they found the body still warm, but he was d.o.a. at the hospital, his tongue already stiff...(sorry i had to go into detail) when he was discovered, the neighborhood went ballistic, the relatives screaming, knocking on neighbors' gates, ringing to dr. marasigan's doorbell who was a few houses away, my uncle accounts it was like a scene from a movie, something he though he'd never see in real life...the story goes that this guy was depressed because of his girlfriend. our neighbor told us that she was being paired up with a foreigner, thus the depressed boyfriend...jeesh, you'll never really know what'll happen next in that household. their sister got knocked up by her boyfriend just last year...and now this. their life story really is mmk-worth.

i still wanna be over there at puerto galera right now, but in some way it's a good thing that i weren't coz if i was i would've woken early this morning just in time to see everything. i'm happy that i don't have his dead image on my mind, unlike my uncle who saw it as soon as he woke up (what a good morning greeting...) i guess it would've been less spine-chilling if it happened in a house further away, a very distant neighbor...and if we didn't know the dead guy. but the fact is, we'll always be haunted by the sight of our neighbor's garage, imagining what his body might've looked like, or reliving the minutes before his death. i didn't know him personally but my cousin and uncle do, me i only see him and greet him whenever i do.

just when i thought i was out for a normal saturday.......

blog revelations

apparently, there are more people reading my blog than i know of...and they've been reading for a year now! anyway...i guess it's ok since they're the ones among my friends that i can really trust (suddenly i'm not so sure...haha :P) no seriously they are and i'm not just making parinig...rest assured though, my posting would remain the same, (i hope) even now that i know i have an audience i was't aware of before...

now i have a confession to make...i'm sorry blog but i've been cheating on you. yes, you heard me right. due to the incessant demand of other people who have it, i have followed the bandwagon of the infamous live journal...but don't worry blog...at least i find you easier to update...plus my lj looks so plain. and another thing, you're the one i'm updating right now...and if it's any consolation...i can always do you both at the same time!

i think i'm going nuts talking to my blog...seriously i think something's gone loose...

it's just that i'm having a hard time looking for my homework online...we're supposed to list topics on sustainable architectural technologies developed or used here locally...so far i've found four but they're all too common and some don't even have enough resources to come up with a good enough research paper on. oh well, i guess i'll just look for some more tomorrow at the library (i have a 5 hour break! jeesh) it's been a long time since i had this much time on my hands in a semester. but then again, maybe that's just because most of my classes are just starting (late!) because of the professors...

some of y orgmates are going to puerto galera this long weekend, and i would really like to go, unfortunately i don't have any more money! i wouldn't have enough money to go christmas shopping...and the fact that my kj mom would never let me go vacationing in the middle of the sem...i'm just hoping we go somewhere this christmas, singapore, hongkong or china...i'd like to see my dad again...

oh well...my mom is going to bed, i can watch tv now (i'm watching LOST season one on dvd, a couple of episodes a day...) plus gela said she might call tonight (how could she if i'm using dial-up?!) so there, until my next entry!

typos...

please forgive me for any typos you see here...i'm only human...and a very poor typist...anyway, hangover's gone...back to reality.

major hangover

last night was our induction to the org i applied for this year...i'd really like to tell you all about it...if only i can remember what happened...god my head hurts...

it was fortunate that the venue for the event was near my house, otherwise i wouldn't have been allowed to go (and couldn't have come home by myself!). the induction should've been held at the end of last semester, but plumbing problems moved it to a later date, so after only a week of school there we were, partying like we had nothing else to do. (i've decided to drop the codenames coz my headache's giving me a hard time recalling everyone's codename, plus this involves a lot of people outside the 22...)

since jid, drea, ben and macky were from another class, they were left behind. meanwhile, pat and jik went with me. we passed by my house to get my stuff then we were off to the location. it was surprisingly near my house, as in just 10-15 mins away. we got there but only a few people were already there. we just sat around waiting for the others to arrive. when all of my fellow inductees arrived, we dressed up to our costumes (hat themed!) and talked about our mini presentation...it's incredible what we (or i) would do for af...i've never been that silly outside home (i am very silly at home especially when i'm with my sister...) but its fun, impromptu skits are the goofiest, we were so bad that it was actually funny. we just had this setting at a saloon or bar of sorts with two rival gangs of cowboys, cadets, architects and err...shark food and a really obese frankenstein. the skit wasn't particularly funny in itself really, it the things all of us were willing to do in our costumes that made it worth a snicker at least.

anyway, after that, we were given awards for our performance in the application. i got the most emotional during the interview award...jeesh didn't anybody else cry like i did? anyway, at least my tears were legit and i was only that emotional because like i told them, it felt good to be given a second chance and then finally be accepted to a new group of friends. after the awarding, we were once again blindfolded and led to our positions. each of the members welcomed us personally, which was a great feeling for me becase i really feel like the application process didn't end without me knowing each of them and somehow established some relationship with all of them. it was surprising that i could tell who was talking to me even just by their voices (well at least those who weren't changing their voices, but then again, we all knew it was noel who was doing those crazy voices), something i shamefully never experienced anywhere else. after reciting the preamble (as a member, at last!) we were then pushed to the freezing pool (in our costumes!) my denims immediately made me ten times heavier and pulled me down the water, goog thing i'm tall and i know how to swim. not the same could be said of mau who fortunately was beside me and was able to grab my hand. we all knew it was coming though, it was just the anticipation of when and how it would feel like that kept us wary. we came out of the pool, soaking wet, freezing like mad...good thing there were towels to go around. the others continued to swim, but i couldn't take the cold...brr...

so we changed our clothes then proceeded to consuming the bountiful supply of barbeque. after dinner, we watched pbb while the members dipped in the pool, with occassional screaming coming from girls that noel keeps picking up to throw into the pool. then some singing beside the piano while the others started their drinking session. after a few rounds of pusoy dos, i decided to go down and join the others who were drinking beside the pool. now this is where things got interesting...embarassing...but interesting...at least from what is existent in my memory...

i sat with mill, tal, cheska, foom, ben, jika, mau, lex, mikey, sudar, and sir mata. other people would come and go. mill keeps on insisting i take continuous shots of brandy...to be honest, i've never really liked brandy, i've never been drunk with brandy...i'm more of a beer or gin person. i already had two bottles of beer prior to this drinking session and i was tipsy after the fifth or sixth shot. (ang taas ba namang magtagay ni mikey at wala pang coke man lang para sa chaser...chaser namin beer..) i was really getting woozy. i've never really been a heavy drinker, i've only been wasted about four times, this night was about to be the fifth. it surprised me that i wan't puking as early as i normally would. everything led to drinking some more...and then some more...and some more still...until i was totally opposite of what i normally am in public. god was i loud! i'm normally a very quiet person, all my friends know that...but when the alcohol starts kicking in, i dunno, i turn into this loudmouth who doesn't mind what the hell i'm saying.

from what i can recall, among others, i believe i said something about af being the org who'll fight for a tambayan, sang the alphabet backwards, keep on saying to agnes that i wouldn't be remembering any of this in the morning, which is true because i don't...after that everything is blank, i don't even remeber going to bed. i think it was lex who took me to the room. all i could remember are voices, a lot of voices saying my name..., i remember almost falling into the pool, falling out of bed...but that's it...i don't even remember puking...normally if i drink i reach a point of wanting to vomit, so i go to the bathroom or a nearby bush to do my business and be semi-sober for the rest of the evening...last night, i was so wasted, i seriously don't even remember puking. but i did, i know i did. my shirt was all stained, and tal kept sayin i puked all over her sandals, and i saw her washing them in the bathroom sink the morning after. god it was so embarrassing!!!not a day has passed by with me being a member and there i was puking my guts out on all the members.

i'm actually quite worried having to see them again on monday. ugh i'll never hear the end of it, i'll probably go down as one the most, if not the only, wasted inductee in af history. sobrang nahihiya ako kay tal, agnes, lex, sa kanilang lahat! but then i'm also thankful to all of them for taking care of me. i believe i've gained true friends form af. i just hope they'll forgive and forget any of this happening!!! i'm worried that i've said tings that i shouldn't have...and worried that some of them might see me differently now...i don't now if it is good thing or a bad thing, but nonetheless, i'm extremely anxious of what will happen next. i hope tal isn't mad at me for ruining her sandals. jas reassured me it's ok but i'm really worried still. oh well, guess all this worrying will end once i hear everything that really happened....or it might just worry me more...haha, i swear, i'll never be this wasted again...hangovers are a bummer...my head aches, my tummy aches, and done nothing today but sleep on my bed...



*something is bothering me though, i dunno if it was just a dream or my imagination running wild, but i think something happened when i was drunk...i'm not telling though...

nothing interesting here

i've nothing to blog really, i just felt like writing...well today's supposedly my first day of class...but as usual i went to school for nothing. my professors were visibly invisible...ugh i can't believe we're off to another sem...the last sem before thesis year to be more precise...i dunno why thesis is such a daunting thing to me...i hope i don't have that hard a time at it. oh well, i think its inevitable, but at least i hope it runs smoothly albeit it being really difficult.

this sem's supposed to be easier...i don't have any dytoc class anymore (i hope! coz arch 172 is calling his name...) i'm so happy that i won't have to go home super late at night anymore!!!

i wonder if i should go to school tomorrow...*yawn* getting sleepy...

btw, we have a new pup! he's only 6 weeks old but what a feisty little cretin! after endless argument of what to name it, we ended up with mc-mc...he's related to pao-pao. i liked the name cobi or kobi but i was reserving it for a labrador if ever i get one...

i'll post some pix...once i figure out how...

agnostic thoughts...

today was a day of a rollercoaster of emotions, (figuratively and literally)...i woke up in the morning to my alarm, not really remembering why i set it so early... then i remembered we were off to enchanted kingdom today with my cousins. i got ready quickly and fixed myself some toast...

my younger sister was supposed to go with us but my evil older sister got in the way. janet had the fault of not finishing her book report early in the sembreak, so julie was on to her as soon as everyone was up. they had this short but intense argument as they were having breakfast, brough about by a simple issue of a messy desk...janet talked back and julie started to throw her things to the floor...i personally was shocked that this happened so early in the morning over a messy desk!!! i felt like i had to do something, so as i went over to my cousin's place, i texted my sister these messages of how i think her harsh behavior was unneccessary. i'm actually very proud of myself because i know i dealt with it with a mature mind and i was the only one who did. being in the moddle of the two, i was in a position of a younger and older brother of two sisters. i think i put some sense into their minds and made them make up. it's funny that i'm supposed to be the agnostic one in the house and all of 'em are supposed to be christians, yet im the one whos the most christ-like among them...i hate that it gives me satisfaction that i am. anyway, it had to be done. just to mediate the two sides....for the sake of our family and keeping a healthy atmosphere around the house. i hate it when people here argue...especially when it's about a fucking desk.

so we were off to ek, with my five cousins, my neice, and my tita. my cousins were first timers, so i became their "tour guide". i showed them where all the great rides were and which to take first. we rode the rollercoaster, anchors away, log jam, ferris wheel, rialto, flying fiesta, 4D, and the rio grande rapids. then another ride on the rollercoaster before going home. i was fun guy in the bunch, convincing them to go on the rides. they were apprehensiva at first but enjoyed themselves soon after. i'd like to believe that i'm one of the fun older cousins...if it was my sister there, they wouldn't have had so many rides. i enjoyed myself as well even if i already knew what i was in for. i'm not afraid to have fu unlike my other siblings and cousins, that's why when they're with me, they get to do things they normally wouldn't be allowed to do. which gives me satisfaction again...it's again for a healthier outlook on life. life is fun if you want it to be....

every thing was going great, we were having one of the best days of our lives...then bad new came when we were about to exit...we got news that our youngest cousin, mariel, a two and a half month old premature baby passed away in the ICU. this made our day less enjoyable as it was meant to be. this stresses my position of being an agnostic. i really don't wanna believe that there is a god and the things that the church (catholic or christian) teach. i'm a very skeptical and logical person, everything has to have an explanation. there's just so many things about god that's unanswered and no one seems to know the answer! i mean for example, if there is a god and he is all powerful, and all merciful, then why the heck does a two-month old baby die like this huh! if everything has a god damn purpose, then tell me what the hell does her death mean??? why did she have to die??? if all life comes from god, then why did he give mariel such a short one? i mean is he trying to play a trick? is this some kind of a divine joke? "i'm gonna give you life...ooops, time to take it back, you weren't supposed to live!" what the fuck! how come criminals and polticians continue to roam our world, yet innocent, pure, clean infants like mariel didn't even get the chance to see anything other than the ICU's ceiling? what's her purpose, did she have one? or was she just something god created but realized she was a reject. if god is fair, then that must mean that he's fake coz this definitely ain't fair in my opinion. my sociology prof was right...things happen...shit happens...there is no destiny, no fate, no purpose, and not all things happen for a reason. i finally believe my professor coz now i have proof. my ex-discipler once told me "give your prof cancer, and you'll see, he'll believe in god..." now i can talk back..."what if your firstborn dies in the ICU...will you still believe that god willed it?" i mean what the hell was he doing if he did? why will he "will" a baby so innocent to die like that? is that what you call mercy? shit. there must be no god...or at least if there is one, he isn't all powerful, all merciful, and all the crap the church says he is. i'll grieve for our loss of mariel, but deep inside i know that this didn't happen for a reason...this wasn't in the plan of a god...it just happened because that's life, nothing else...shit does happen, it's just too bad that it happened to us this time...

sibling rivalry for breakfast............amusement park rides for lunch.............baby-killers for dinner.............
just another day in jax's box..........

beachin' fun 2

who knew i'd get to go to the beach twice this sembreak?! this time i went with my family to my tita's place in zambales. it's a good thing my mom finally reunited with her best friend, now she actually has a social life! the beach there is incredible!!! contrary to the calm shallow waters of batangas, the waves in zambales were huge and they crash to the shore like our laundry does. it was a very private beach therefore we were the only ones there. and the place looked like it was untouched by man, truly breathtaking. the weather was windy, the sun wasn't too intense, and being in that atmosphere of peace just made me feel really good. i could live there forever!!! what's more is that us kids get to reuniter with the magsaysay guys as well. they're so much fun to have around. i would've wanted to ride the waves with them but i don't have a board and my mom obviously won't let me. but waddling on the shore against the raging waves was more than enough for me. the food was also great, i gained three pounds overnight!

we checked in this resort inn which had a pool (a weird one because its water was salty as well...). we didn't have tv in our room so we spent our night outside with the other guests. there was one tv in the cafe... there were four americans with their pokpok wives with them drinking their heads off...it's so frustrating cause they hogged the videoke machine, we didn't even got a chance to sing! their voices weren't pleasing at all if i may say so...those whores really piss me off because they were trashy and spoke like palengkeras. at least one of the americans greeted us and introduced his little kid. so as they kept on singing, we just watched our usual late night tv shows...everything was going ok when one of 'em americans went to the bathroom to take a leak and had his dick out even before he got there...it's kind of repulsive, that behavior... but then he must've been 99% alcohol already by that time so i'd cut him some slack....

anyway, our trip there was cut short by my mom's work (as always...) after two days and one night at the beach, we went on our way back home, exhausted but relaxed (if that's possible...) all in all the trip was superb....except the four-hour ride going there and another going home...oh well, i'd do it all again in a snap..

* i forgot to include this before...
i really hate it when my mom brings up my childhood...raffy was my friend (is my friend? yes is...) was my playmate as a kid.. but don't parents know when to stop talking about us when we were kids? when i saw raffy again, i think we were both embarrassed when my mom started chattering about when we used to play around and pretend to strangle each other and even posed for pictures...it was so fucking embarrassing! i mean we're no longer kids! those were days we could do without! it's no longer funny!!!